Case in point, I have a friend who works out to classical symphonic music. Personally, I prefer light NYC Hardcore (Propain), but that's what gets my "Ra, Ra, Fight, Fight," juices flowing. I don't work out as hard or as often as my friend, so maybe she knows something I don't.
When songwriting, the intention of the writer is less subjective. We typically know exactly what we are burying in metaphor. However, even though a writer can choose topic, when in full writing swing, the control of the process can get meditative pretty easily. I am a big supporter of letting it, for the sake of the song, the integrity of the process, and the honesty of the moment. Anyone who has written numerous works knows exactly what I am speaking of. I hear writers say it all the dayum time: the universe gifts them the song, they are only channeling it.
That is exactly how I feel when writing. It is an experience in creativity I would not trade for anything.
The issue, after the fact, is perception of the listener. I want to always remain fearless in creativity. Nay, I will always remain fearless and unapologetic. I'd rather be accused of being an honest asshole than a vanilla fluff artist. It's the reason I name drop. It's the reason I anything drop. It's the reason why my guts are left wide open for everyone to see. Let's be honest about it, anything I write might as well be about my life experiences, as I have no illusions or delusions about millions of fans or listeners. It's my story told the way I see fit. If one person gets it, that's good enough.
Understanding that we are not as important as maybe our fragile egos believe us to be is a hard lesson in humility, and one I find myself having to take forced refresher courses on frequently. I smh at others that don't. Arrogance can lead to greatness, but also isolation from reality. Humility may be a more enlightened path, but definitely less traveled. Hopefully there is a balance.
My karma seems to be a bit more instant lately. If I wrong someone, I am wronged in return 10 fold. If I force myself onto others with no regard to their piece of mind, someone is always in line to return the favor with passion. Mostly: every time I find myself tearing others down to build myself up, I can't hide from the barrage of ignorant judgments flung back at me.
As I round the corner into my 42nd year on this planet, I hope to maybe rise above bad karma. Maybe judge a bit less? In the end, everything is happening exactly the way it should. Why shouldn't my impact be positive? On the same line, why shouldn't I expect positive impact from others?
In the middle of a bad night, I received a message on Words With Friends (a minor addiction lately) saying: "Thankful for you, my friend." Exactly what the doctor ordered and a perfect example of the little things in life that can lift someone up with no solicitation. Muy Bueno, AshAnne7. Selfless and beautiful.
One thing is definitely for sure, I will continue to write, that much is not up to me at all. What is up to me is what I write about, and the honesty of the process. By demons be driven on both fronts. I know no other way. Word.
Happy Thanksgiving. If you see me today, buy me a coffee.
Nago
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